You Aren’t Interesting; Quit Bitching

“Being gloomy is easier than being cheerful. Anybody can say ‘I’ve got cancer’ and get a rise out of a crowd. But how many of us can do five minutes of good stand-up comedy?” – P.J. O’Rourke in All the Trouble in the World.

As a sophomore in high school, I am not immune to moronic moaners and constant complainers. Indeed, I witness this egotistic self-loathing every day. Bob says he has a test for chemistry; John forgot his English homework. Boo hoo. Can’t these people ever shut up?! Bitching about teachers and whining about “big” projects is not going to change the outcome of any grade, teacher’s being, or quality of any work. Truly, these complainers complain for only two reasons: To gather sympathy and to “cope” with the “horrors” of their lives.

As for gathering sympathy, I ask ‘why?’. Complainers aren’t interesting, and, trust me, no one is interested. Maybe crying to parents for every scratch and bump worked as a toddler, but it doesn’t now. We must grow up, and learn to deal with our problems without the help of others.

As for coping, it’s selfish. Each person has enough problems on their own; they don’t need leeches that require sympathy. “Deal with your problems, and I’ll deal with mine”, a motto I think we must all learn.

What ever happened to complaining about problems that mattered? No one’s parents are getting divorced? No one found out they’ve got cancer? How boring!

We all have problems. And trust me: My colleagues’ problems aren’t special. My message: Calm down, just do the assignment, and shut up.