A Letter to Myself

(The idea for this post was entirely ripped from this guy.)

You grew frustrated today — frustrated with people, school, work, and yourself. You snapped at people, offering sarcastic responses to legitimate questions and inquires. You let yourself grow unjustifiably pompous. And you let your anger bottle up.

It started in the morning. You woke up late, and started your day with a bad attitude. When you got to school and saw people standing in front of your locker, you should have asked them to move politely. But instead, you asked them to have some “f*cking courtesy”. How were they to know you wanted to access your locker? In what context could they have foreseen your irregularly late arrival?

At band class, a friend of yours wanted to speak to you, and this made you even angrier. You threw at him more expletives, forcing him to leave you with your self-pity. You did this because you consider his discussions to be meaningless — trivial even — but you must consider, too, how he perceives your conversations. He misinterprets your smiles, thinking that you actually enjoy his sexually obscene and assaultive humor. You should explain to him how you do not enjoy his humor, and tell him your feelings toward his general discussion topics.

Later at band class, the director asked to speak to you privately. Just yesterday, you wrote a sappy letter explaining why you could not perform at a church service you promised you could perform at. This discussion exemplified the misinterpretation you lead people off to; for he believed that you were afraid of him, that you wrote the letter in that fluffy sort-of-way not because you were deeply sorry (which you were), but because you were genuinely afraid of what he might do in response. Confused and bewildered, you offered a five-word response and ran off. Next time, clearly explain what your intended meaning is, and perhaps his perception of your character may become more accurate. You fail to realize how important your reputation is — how vital is their perception of you.

After school, you ran to the nearby Elementary School to tutor. You knew you were going to tutor a new kid, James, and this excited you. So at the school, you found your new student, and began to instruct. But you instructed him poorly. You saw that he did not understand the basic concepts even after much repetition; and in response, you started speaking quicker and started using more advanced vocabulary, subsequently confusing your new student even further. You grew frustrated, you increased the volume to your voice, and you may have very well frightened him.

Joe: The main problems in your life are social. They regard the way you carry yourself, and the way you respond and act towards other people. You must be more open, and you must believe in the value of perception. Ask yourself: “If the words I speak were spoken to me by someone else, would I be hurt by them, or possibly misdirected”?

You live under a cloud, as if your pleasure is all that matters. But if you really wanted to be objective about it all, you would realize that closing yourself into the egotistical, self-loathing box you’ve gotten yourself into prevents the very pleasure you so seek.

It is time for you to change your personality, your essence. Do it now.


4 Responses to “A Letter to Myself”

  1. I’ll give you feedback on your success or failure.

  2. i noticed a striking similarity between all the people that you interacted with on your day. all of them are doing something wrong, or at least you think they are: the people are blocking your way, your friend is misunderstanding you, the director is possibly violent, James is slow to understand….

    i am happy for you that you made the decision to change. but i am worried that you might not necessarily change for the better. the last two paragraphs of your post is great. those words should be what you follow, not the suggestions that you made to yourself at the end of the other paragraphs.

    good luck on your change

  3. I like your reply, Bosnia. There’s not much advice I can offer you except the “think before you act” & “treat others as you would like them to treat you” cliches. However, I think these are two ethics that you should focus on. Good luck.

  4. The final statement that I’d like to add is: Don’t dismiss what others say so quickly, and don’t assume what they say is meaningless.

    I’m sure you want your voice to be heard, (or why else would you have a blog?)

    You never know what someone could tell you. It could help you a lot.

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